Ralph, new in the program, was
walking in the woods thinking about his new sponsor's urging that he think
seriously about getting a Higher Power. After a life of atheism, Ralph decided
taking up a faith in some kind of deity would be rank hypocrisy, so he decided
to do without. Besides, it was a beautiful day in the woods, the sun was
shining, the birds were singing, the leaves on the trees above him whispering
in soft warm breezes. Wasn't that spiritual?
Just then Ralph heard rustling in
the bushes behind him. He turned and saw an eight foot grizzly bear charge
toward him. Running as fast as he could, Ralph glanced over his shoulder and
saw that the bear was closing on him. Just then he tripped on an exposed root and
fell on the ground. He rolled over and saw that the bear was over him, roaring,
its huge clawed paws waving over its head the bear ready to strike.
"Oh, my god!" cried
Ralph.
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
All was silent.
As a bright light came from the
sky, Ralph heard a voice say, "Didn't your sponsor tell you to get a
Higher Power? Are you ready for one now?"
Ralph was consistent, if not
sensible. "It would be hypocritical of me to change my whole life and
suddenly ask a god, which you seem to think you are, to protect me." The
bear was still up there, however, claws poised to tear Ralph to pieces, drool still
dangling from the tips of the beast's teeth. Ralph happened upon a way to work
around all the Higher Power/menacing bear stuff.
"So," prompted the
voice, "am I your Higher Power now?"
"No. I'm not ready for that
just yet. But maybe you could make the bear a Christian?"
"Very well," said the
voice."
The light dimmed.
The sounds of the forest resumed.
The bear looked confused for a
moment, then bowed its head, put its paws together, and said, "Lord bless
this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our
Lord, Amen."
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